Hospital keeping me on tender hooks AGAIN.....

So you might gather that from the title of this post its not gonna be a good post. Well back in early Oct I had a CT scan the usual 3 monthly one and was told to ring for a results appointment I did phone and had an appointment a week or so ago still no results but Onc assured me that all was going to be ok and that she would phone or write with the results as she didn't anticipate it being anything bad. Fast forward onto today and I have a letter asking me to book yet another CT scan and a blood test at my local GP's so on the face of it doesn't inspire me at all in fact I feel like total shit why can't they just tell me what the fuck is wrong!!!! I mean it is my body right! All this is it bad or isn't it bad shit just tears me apart its so stressful if I didn't have anything wrong before I'm gonna get ill just from the anxiety of it all. Bloody fucking shitty hospital will keep you posted and update this later as I've spoken with Onc's secretary and told her I need some answers by the end of today otherwise I shall just keep ringing and ringing and tomorrow I shall go up there until I know what the fuck is going on.

Turning a corner.....Happy New Year.....

Ok its a bit belated but the New Year passed somewhat quietly on my own as my partner went over to be with his brothers for the evening and I was ill on the sofa with yet another migraine yipeee!! Any way the good news is I've just received a letter from the hospital telling me that my CT and Bone scans looked normal, what they mean is everything looks exactly as it was over a year ago, so a huge sigh of relief and now planning yes you heard me planning for the year.

There's quite a lot I need to achieve this year and I'm going to have to do it without any stress, here's a list of what's GOT to happen.

1. Move house, further up the line to Somerset to be nearer my family and friends, Devon is beautiful BUT its sort of tainted since all of this breast cancer crap and we haven't had an awful lot of luck living here, like I said totally stunning place but no jobs, hardly any friends (we've lived here for 8 years and hardly know anyone!), the locals aren't that friendly and we have problems with our rented flat, water coming in through the lounge and bedroom we have informed the landlords but they quite simply are not interested, the building needs a lot of money spent on it to bring it up to scratch and they just don't want to do it, also at xmas they gave us a box of biscuits and a xmas card with one hand and in the other a letter informing of a rent increase, which is pretty crap considering they haven't spent any money on the place and its freezing. Enough of the whinge about the flat and onwards and upwards.
So a definite move is on the cards.

2. Due to the anticipated move I am trying to streamline my possessions, so for the past few days I've been going through my stuff and putting stuff into boxes for car boot or charity shop, or just plain throwing stuff away that I've been holding onto and haven't looked at in years and years, cutting out the clutter is very very cleansing literally! So in the spirit of letting go......goodbye my piles old letters dating back to 1996!!! goodbye all the little bits of paper that I think I know I'll make a collage with that and then never do.... ta da and good riddance.

3. Dieting, well not so much dieting, but cutting out all the sugary chocolate treats and cakes that I've indulged in over the xmas period, no more crap! Just good ole healthy organic fresh food and juice. I have managed to keep up with the juicing now in nearly 2 years and regularly take my supplements, all I need to do now is too loose some of the treatment indued weight I've put on and try and regain a waist! Been watching the hairy dieters and I'm loving their food so will try out some of their recipes.

4. Get creative! It sounds simple especially as I am an artist BUT I have been struggling with this one ever since I was dx and think my lack of self confidence is probably the real culprit as too why my creative mojo has gone walk about! At the end of the month I am aiming to have some art works on the go and be ready to give an art lesson to the lady that does spiritual healing for me this might be the necessary kick up the bum I need to get myself going again.

5. TOTALLY GIVE UP ALL PROCESSED FOODS. (see next post)

So Happy New Year to you all, sending all love and light and as always 'Live in the Moment' and be happy xxxxx

Depression linked to artificial light during the night

Switching off your TV or computer before bed may help to prevent depression, new research suggests. A study on animals by researchers at the Ohio State University Medical Centre found that exposure to dim lighting at night from electronic displays and other sources may lead to mood disorders. Siberian hamsters were exposed to different light and dark conditions for four weeks. Half of the animals received a chronic dim light setting - the equivalent to having a TV on in a dark room - throughout the night. When compared with the hamsters exposed to complete darkness, those that experienced low light lacked energy, motivation and were less likely to drink their sugar water.

“The results we found in hamsters are consistent with what we know about depression in humans,” said Tracy Bedrosian, one of the authors of the study.

The findings highlighted changes in the tissue of the hippocampus which were similar to changes found in people with depression. Within a week of returning to a standard light-dark cycle, the hamsters had made a full recovery.

Researchers say that the rise in exposure to artificial light at night over the last 50 years has coincided with rising rates of depression, especially among women. Light pollution can come from electronic displays, overhead lighting in the home as well as streetlights, passing traffic and neighbouring buildings.

“The good news is that people who stay up late in front of the television and computer may be able to undo some of the harmful effects just by going back to a regular light-dark cycle and minimising their exposure to artificial light at night,” Bedrosian says. “That’s what the results we found in hamsters would suggest.” The results are published in the Molecular Psychiatry journal and the article was taken from my email news.

It has been suggested that breast cancer may be caused in someway by depression and stress, most of the women that I have spoken with who have breast cancer certainly either had a bad bout of depression or severe to moderate stress prior to diagnoses. I did write another article on lack of the hormone melatonin due to lack of sleep and the connection to nightshift workers and cancer. All of this definitely needs further research, although even if it is depression/stress how are we going to tackle it in an attempt to halt or stop someone getting cancer, its food for thought.