Massive news.....

Last Friday I went in for the results of my latest CT scan, the last one I actually had with dye contrast (they managed to get a needle in) so I was secretly dreading the outcome (you can see more with the contrast) basically I've got the all clear! Yep its happened I've got the all clear, the cancer on both lungs and liver has disappeared or as the Onc's Reg explained its so tiny we can't detect it on the CT scan. This is the best news ever........I am such a lucky, lucky, lucky girl. I knew about the lungs from the start but only found out by accident about the liver when I read a scan report that mentioned lesions on my liver!!! So for them to declare no sign of disease in both lungs and liver is mind blowing. Whilst I was feeling elated the Onc's Reg quickly came back to me with "but of course your never really going to get rid of it, its always going to be there, eventually it will come back, but we will deal with that as and when it shows itself, in the meantime your to continue indefinitely on Herceptin and Anastrozole" and swiftly back down to earth again with a thud. Yep they sure know how to drag you on that roller coaster don't they? I don't care what they say as far as I'm concerned I'm cancer free and I'm not going to let anyone bring me down about this news.

I am living proof that cancer by its very nature of being random can for no reason of its own just disappear. Obviously I've been down the clean and green path (although have too say I've fallen off the wagon recently and enjoy chocolate, biscuits and cake), I've taken every supplement known to man, taken a shit load of cannabis oil (especially in the first year of being dx), I've gone down the conventional route of being poisoned, cut and burned, all in all I've thrown everything at this shit and something has worked or is working and long may it continue.

Whilst walking on air out of the oncology department I waited outside for the other half to pick me up, another lady was waiting and we got chatting, she told me about her dx in her 40's (like me) over 20 years ago!!! with breast cancer, and that it had only just decided to show itself again and now she has all these options and drugs to try out, she told me to stay positive and live my life, she was a breath of fresh air, I figured that as I turn 50 this year if I get another 20 years of life I'll be 70 and that would be ok with me. I wouldn't want to live any longer than that anyway (after watching people in there 80s, 90s including my own grandmother who lived to 103 once you get to a certain age its best to go peacefully than to hang on to life that is full of illness and suffering).

In view of trying to maintain a normal-ish life I wont be posting as often as I used to and whilst this blog has been a constant source of comfort and help in venting and ranting, I would like to try and put the monkey on my shoulder even further behind me and in the distance. Of course I will from time to time post and will keep all of my readers up to date with surgery etc If anyone would like to speak to me or discuss anything at all please leave a comment and I will get back to you.

Remember to LIVE FOR THE MOMENT and SAVOUR EVERY SECOND.
LOVE AND LIGHT TO ALL  OF YOU. XXXX

Arimidex or NOT...... that is the question

So as many of you will know I have been kind of given the all clear see few posts below. All the scans are clear and there is currently no cancer anywhere whoopie! However, in place of the dammed Tamoxifen which I stopped taking on the 21st July I have been prescribed Arimidex because apparently I am now through the menopause. Last week I decided to have a look into the side effects of this particular hormonal drug and found to my horror even worse side effects than the Tami! My main ache on Tami was the weight gain and the migraines, on this new tablet the side effects are and I quote from real life stories cataracts and blindness!, more fucking weight gain, joint pain, migraines etc etc etc oh with the added high possibility that I will develop arthritis in my thumbs (already have problems with the thumbs) which would need operations!! WOW and they didn't tell me of any of these side effects when they prescribed it to me if they had of done I would of said a flat out NO THANKS. Feeling a bit livid with the docs and hospital for not telling me of this and have weighed it all up...... so if I take it I might prolong my life by a bit longer but I might go blind and have problems with my hands so wouldn't be able to paint and create its a no brainer really isn't it of course I'm not gonna take the shit, I'd rather not be here if I couldn't see the world to create my art. I have an appointment in October to see how I'm going on the Arimidex..... yeah right.....!!!!! not sure what I will tell them at the moment and quite honestly don't want to take anything else. Will continue on the Herceptin because in comparison the side effects are minimal and don't affect me that badly. I would be interested to hear from any of you reading about this drug Arimidex or by brand name Anastrozole and your experiences on this and if you find or recomend any of the other hormonal drugs to be better or with less horrible side effects. Please post a comment below and I will return the message. In place of prescribed drugs I sent off and received my first supply of 120 caps of DIM which I am going to take as a natural alternative to the hormonal's for further information see my report on it in the post titled "DIM definitely not stupid......"Many thanks for listening.