We are still coming to terms with the tragic loss of our lovely Ted we also found out on the same day that one of my close friends mother had lost her battle with Myeloma Cancer we were dx at the same time 3 years ago and had built up a support network for each other both of us enjoying juicing and living life healthy then wallop she's gone, the chemo she had been on stopped working this coupled with a fall in the night where she broke her leg (she was 70) was the final straw and she was put in the hospice and never came out. We will be going to her funeral tomorrow and yet again I am reminded how fragile our existence really is. The weird thing was Christine was also an avid cat lover maybe Ted and Christine are together I know he's in good hands with her. Its so hard Teddy was such a character cat and loved the woodland garden. We walked down through bluebell wood this afternoon and it was stunning somehow it just didn't seem the same without Teddy he loved this time of year.
So, life moves on. Lee has booked up his training course for the offshore Rigging in May and will be away for a week and a half when he returns we will take the next step and see about getting him some offshore work for a 3 week period after which we will be able to afford to move which is what we both want now more than ever due to our recent loss.
I had an oncologist appointment to find out what the hell was going on with the 'something' on my Liver apparently the radiologist wont budge and continues to sit on the fence ie: he wont say whether or not it is cancer. So we are back in square one again and I'm to have yet another blasted CT scan in about 6 weeks time!!! because of the back log. I ask you this is so fucking out of order. I feel like giving up. Then I was asked about my migraines to which I replied yes still getting them infact they have increased last week I had 3 and so far I've woken every day this week with a migraine. Thanks to Sumatriptan I am able to function but its not good to wake daily with extreme nausea and a pounding headache so now they want to do an MRI scan on my head to determine if its cancer or just normal migraine stuff, like ya do!!! The only plus from the appointment was that she (registrar not onc) asked how I was doing on the Tamoxifen I decided as we were being honest and open that I would let rip about the shit. I told her about my aching joints and my massive weight gain nearly 4 stone! she agreed that the side effects were extreme (not everyone will react this way) and that weight gain was definitely a result of taking the drug, they have decided to re-check my blood and see if I am through the menopause if I am then they will take me off the dreaded Tamoxifen and replace with another AI that apparently does not cause weight gain although the joint pain might increase. I don't mind this as my joints are taking a bashing with all this excess weight that I've been carrying around. Bloody hope and pray I am through the menopause. It was left that I shall go back for results in July!! seems like a long flipping wait then! Going to see GP about changing hospital only trouble is I'm worried that if I do it now that things could be forgotten about during the transition, so not sure whether its bad timing to change at the moment.
I've been trying to paint but all this shit the deaths, the drugs, just general cancer shite doesn't inspire me to be creative. However I have managed to finish one painting and I've got some prints done so will drop off at a lovely gallery in Weston.
Will keep you posted as too the Liver and now the Head crap. xx
Showing posts with label liver. Show all posts
Showing posts with label liver. Show all posts
Tuesday, 15 April 2014
Wednesday, 6 November 2013
and breath.......results are in.....and its brilliant.....
Sorry its been a while since I posted on the blog but I've been very busy and admit to completely forgetting about posting!!! which is unusual for me. Anyway back to the post and what is going on with me and my 'something' on the liver. I went for an oncology appointment on the 1st of Nov as per usual a registrar walked in the room and just to complicate things further she's indian not that I'm racist but her pigeon english made it hard to understand exactly what she was saying, luckily whilst we (thats me and my partner Lee) were waiting for the Dr. my BCN walked past the room and popped into to see me, she expressed an interest in why I was there (which amazed me as she's not shown that much interest in me before) she asked if she could be present in the room when the Dr. told me the outcome of the latest CT scan on my liver and I told her of course.
So the Dr. walks into the room and starts to go on about 2 lesions on my liver (yes I was sat there in total shock as no one had ever mentioned anything about lesions) she also said "but of course you knew that" too which I replied "uh no, I didn't know anything about lesions on my Liver I was told something like a shadow" at this point I'm starting to well up and I'm getting a bit angry because she's not understanding the whole reason I'm there is to get the results not too be told stuff I knew already that doesn't make any fucking sense does it!!!! It was at this point that my BCN pipped up (first time ever!!) "has Sarah got breast cancer spread on her liver? or not?" Dr. responds "we think it is fatty tissue and the lumps on the liver are benign (ie: not growing) I'm thinking thank fuck for that and was visibly relieved, BCN also looked relieved then BCN left the room and came back in with my actual oncologist Dr. K. I haven't seem him for nearly 2 years as I either got fobbed off with a registrar and in some part because he was dx with liver cancer a year ago and has been fighting it. He looked well and was very pleased to see me, he told me that "I'm not worried about your Liver its just fatty tissue (probably to do with the chemo and weight gain) and I'm not worried about your Lungs either they are stable and nothing is moving on that front.
We spoke about my treatment ie: Herceptin and Tamoxifen to which he told me they couldn't do anything about the Tamoxifen but he was going to suggest that I transfer from IV Herceptin to sub-cut Herceptin very soon in fact I've just had my last Herceptin by IV the next one will be sub-cut Herceptin. Pretty good job as my veins are pretty shot to pieces and I now live in dread of the next IV (the sub cut will be injected into good old fatty tissue to which I said "I've got enough of that" All in all it was one of the best onc. appt. I've ever had and I let out a huge sigh of relief on the way out the receptionist heard me and said " I presume it was good news, bless you" she's a lovely lady it must be hard working in there as you get to know all the patients by first name, some survive and some don't, bloody hard job.
So the Dr. walks into the room and starts to go on about 2 lesions on my liver (yes I was sat there in total shock as no one had ever mentioned anything about lesions) she also said "but of course you knew that" too which I replied "uh no, I didn't know anything about lesions on my Liver I was told something like a shadow" at this point I'm starting to well up and I'm getting a bit angry because she's not understanding the whole reason I'm there is to get the results not too be told stuff I knew already that doesn't make any fucking sense does it!!!! It was at this point that my BCN pipped up (first time ever!!) "has Sarah got breast cancer spread on her liver? or not?" Dr. responds "we think it is fatty tissue and the lumps on the liver are benign (ie: not growing) I'm thinking thank fuck for that and was visibly relieved, BCN also looked relieved then BCN left the room and came back in with my actual oncologist Dr. K. I haven't seem him for nearly 2 years as I either got fobbed off with a registrar and in some part because he was dx with liver cancer a year ago and has been fighting it. He looked well and was very pleased to see me, he told me that "I'm not worried about your Liver its just fatty tissue (probably to do with the chemo and weight gain) and I'm not worried about your Lungs either they are stable and nothing is moving on that front.
We spoke about my treatment ie: Herceptin and Tamoxifen to which he told me they couldn't do anything about the Tamoxifen but he was going to suggest that I transfer from IV Herceptin to sub-cut Herceptin very soon in fact I've just had my last Herceptin by IV the next one will be sub-cut Herceptin. Pretty good job as my veins are pretty shot to pieces and I now live in dread of the next IV (the sub cut will be injected into good old fatty tissue to which I said "I've got enough of that" All in all it was one of the best onc. appt. I've ever had and I let out a huge sigh of relief on the way out the receptionist heard me and said " I presume it was good news, bless you" she's a lovely lady it must be hard working in there as you get to know all the patients by first name, some survive and some don't, bloody hard job.
Saturday, 5 October 2013
CT Scan Results........not good....
Hello everyone,
As the title of this post would suggest my latest yearly CT scan results are in and not good. The lung mets are still currently the same and classified as in a stable condition BUT 'something' is showing up on my liver at the moment and they (the docs) don't know what it is, so have requested that I have another CT scan asap to take a closer look. Onc. said "we did see it on your last scan" (which was a year ago!!!) and I suppose they were taking a watch and see approach, would of been nice if they'd of told me that was what they were doing!!! Anyway the upshot is we don't know what 'it' is on my liver just that something is showing up on the CT so in the next 2 weeks I should of had a another scan and d-day is the 1st of November.
Urghhhhhhhhh Obviously with a a stage IV dx of breast cancer anyway you always assume the worst, but I am trying to keep myself positive and upbeat, its like someone has tele-ported me back to that first day of being told "you have cancer" such a knock back feel dazed and confused about the whole thing and certainly was not expecting it, especially after all the juicing, supplement taking, and spiritual healing I've been doing, everyone say's I look really healthy, although my answer to that is "I looked really friggin healthy before I got cancer" thats the scary thing about this vile disease. I've decided not to tell my mum and dad yet I think I'll wait until we know what we are dealing with, I don't want to unduly upset them. I've told a couple of friends and treatment practitioners about it and found it helped to share the news and get it off my chest, also some of them needed to know as they don't seem to understand why I might seem distant or withdrawn at times by sharing this with them they get to understand why. Sometimes its harder to hide the truth and I don't need anymore crap at the moment. Feeling like I need to digest what has happened and meditate on healing, so going to spend the rest of the weekend with my brother Andy and partner Lee. Lee was with me at the appointment and as usual was my rock.
During the consultation we also discussed my hormonal status to which I've learned that I'm not through the blasted menopause not by a long shot so it seems I have to continue taking the bloody Tamoxifen, the onc. said with head tilted to one side "why so disappointed at not being through the menopause your so young" yeah true I'm 45 (42 when dx) but whats the point in going back to having periods when your bodies fucked with the drugs, chemo and menopause its not like I'm ever going to be able to have children is it? and as I'm plagued with major side effects from the Tamoxifen and the menopause I'd rather be through with it and move onto another drug that might be a bit more user friendly, honestly these docs say the most stupid things sometimes!
Got the scan in the next 2 weeks and appointment on the 1st so will keep you all posted as too the outcome.
Love and light to all
Sarah xxxx
As the title of this post would suggest my latest yearly CT scan results are in and not good. The lung mets are still currently the same and classified as in a stable condition BUT 'something' is showing up on my liver at the moment and they (the docs) don't know what it is, so have requested that I have another CT scan asap to take a closer look. Onc. said "we did see it on your last scan" (which was a year ago!!!) and I suppose they were taking a watch and see approach, would of been nice if they'd of told me that was what they were doing!!! Anyway the upshot is we don't know what 'it' is on my liver just that something is showing up on the CT so in the next 2 weeks I should of had a another scan and d-day is the 1st of November.
Urghhhhhhhhh Obviously with a a stage IV dx of breast cancer anyway you always assume the worst, but I am trying to keep myself positive and upbeat, its like someone has tele-ported me back to that first day of being told "you have cancer" such a knock back feel dazed and confused about the whole thing and certainly was not expecting it, especially after all the juicing, supplement taking, and spiritual healing I've been doing, everyone say's I look really healthy, although my answer to that is "I looked really friggin healthy before I got cancer" thats the scary thing about this vile disease. I've decided not to tell my mum and dad yet I think I'll wait until we know what we are dealing with, I don't want to unduly upset them. I've told a couple of friends and treatment practitioners about it and found it helped to share the news and get it off my chest, also some of them needed to know as they don't seem to understand why I might seem distant or withdrawn at times by sharing this with them they get to understand why. Sometimes its harder to hide the truth and I don't need anymore crap at the moment. Feeling like I need to digest what has happened and meditate on healing, so going to spend the rest of the weekend with my brother Andy and partner Lee. Lee was with me at the appointment and as usual was my rock.
During the consultation we also discussed my hormonal status to which I've learned that I'm not through the blasted menopause not by a long shot so it seems I have to continue taking the bloody Tamoxifen, the onc. said with head tilted to one side "why so disappointed at not being through the menopause your so young" yeah true I'm 45 (42 when dx) but whats the point in going back to having periods when your bodies fucked with the drugs, chemo and menopause its not like I'm ever going to be able to have children is it? and as I'm plagued with major side effects from the Tamoxifen and the menopause I'd rather be through with it and move onto another drug that might be a bit more user friendly, honestly these docs say the most stupid things sometimes!
Got the scan in the next 2 weeks and appointment on the 1st so will keep you all posted as too the outcome.
Love and light to all
Sarah xxxx
Thursday, 31 January 2013
Kinesiology.....all change......
Attended my appointment for Kinesiology (*see at the bottom for explanation) with a lovely lady by the name of Irene, I was pretty sceptical before I went in for the appointment and decided that as its quite expensive (£40 per half hour session) it would be a one-off to check that I'm not lacking in a specific vitamin or supplement. How wrong can you be?? Irene operates from her home and has a room with a bed and charts all over the wall, all looks very good, prior to going in I had filled in a form detailing my health issues and what supplements and diet fads I had. She asked straight away for my blood group of which I did not know "no problem, she said I can give you that" a small prick on the index finger and we had enough blood to put to the test it showed that I am A positive (this cost an extra £10) (I did ask my GP and Onc. but they didn't know my blood group, or so they say, of course they know as I've had surgery!!!!!) So now armed with what blood group I am she produced as booklet A4 sized of about 8 sheets of paper listing Highly beneficial, Neutral and Avoid everything is listed under one of these sections, red meat (as I'd always thought) is a complete no no (good job I don't eat the stuff then eh!) Unfortunately there was a lot of stuff I do eat that are in the dreaded Avoid section including cows milk, butter, wheat, certain nuts, seeds, beans, oils (far too many to mention) and surprisingly anything remotely orange including the daily vit c supplement that I take, so it would seem a revised clear out of the larder and supplement shelf is in order. uhhhhhhhhhhh thought I'd bloody covered it all when I went on my year long research bender, flipping hell.
In addition to the blood group diet she also got me to lie on the table where she proceeded to perform a series of moves known as Kinesiology on me I was to resist when she pushed on me this gave her the information she needed to ascertain that both my kidneys and liver were damaged probably due to the toxins in the chemo and apparently the bad supplements I have imposed on myself. Ironically when she tested the part of my body that coincides with the lungs she said "nothing wrong with your lungs good and healthy" this has pleased me no end :0) happy dance.
There was I thinking I was on top of everything when in fact some of the stuff I've been taking has been hindering me or making my poor liver and kidneys function worse! So the upshot is I'm going to have to start again on the supplement and diet content.
Irene prescribed I buy Vitamin B/Complex with added magnesium to my arsenal as well as something called Milk Thistle Tincture and Vitamin C (bought from a reputable store see below links*) and Vit D but again in liquid format. Irene also told me not too buy anything from Holland and Barratt oh dear!!! yep you guessed it thats where I get all my stuff she recommended a couple of brands Viridian and A. Vogel both are excellent organic producers but unfortunately they are expensive. So I've put away all my supplements (not throwing them away yet) and kept out the few she agreed I could continue taking, so my supplements list looks something like this at the moment.
x1 Opti Bac for Immunity
x3 Acai Berrie
x2 Turmeric capsules
x1 B/Complex with Magnesium
x2 Vitamin C (with no orange in it)
x2 20 drops in water of Milk Thistle Tincture
Vitamin D in spray formula
All of this was for me personally and for someone with a A+ blood group, so if anyone is interested in Kinesiology I would suggest that you go on this site http://www.kinesiologyfederation.co.uk to find a qualified practitioner in your area and try and find out your blood group from your doctor if your like me and had surgery they will have your blood group somewhere on file.
Links to verified brands http://www.avogel.co.uk and http://www.viridian-nutrition.com
Blood type diet book writer Dr Peter D Adamo http://www.dadamo.com/ and if your blood type A and have breast cancer then this is worth a read http://naturalhealthtechniques.com/specificdiseasesbreast_cancer_blood_type_a.htm
*The Kinesiology Federation gives the following definition:
'Kinesiology, literally the study of body movement, is a holistic approach to balancing the movement and interaction of a person's energy systems. Gentle assessment of muscle response monitors those areas where blocks and imbalances are impairing physical, emotional or energetic well -being. The same method can identify factors that may be contributing to such imbalances. The body's natural healing responses are stimulated by attention to reflex and acupressure points, and by use of specific body movements and nutritional support. These can lead to increased physical and mental, emotional and spiritual well-being.'
In addition to the blood group diet she also got me to lie on the table where she proceeded to perform a series of moves known as Kinesiology on me I was to resist when she pushed on me this gave her the information she needed to ascertain that both my kidneys and liver were damaged probably due to the toxins in the chemo and apparently the bad supplements I have imposed on myself. Ironically when she tested the part of my body that coincides with the lungs she said "nothing wrong with your lungs good and healthy" this has pleased me no end :0) happy dance.
There was I thinking I was on top of everything when in fact some of the stuff I've been taking has been hindering me or making my poor liver and kidneys function worse! So the upshot is I'm going to have to start again on the supplement and diet content.
Irene prescribed I buy Vitamin B/Complex with added magnesium to my arsenal as well as something called Milk Thistle Tincture and Vitamin C (bought from a reputable store see below links*) and Vit D but again in liquid format. Irene also told me not too buy anything from Holland and Barratt oh dear!!! yep you guessed it thats where I get all my stuff she recommended a couple of brands Viridian and A. Vogel both are excellent organic producers but unfortunately they are expensive. So I've put away all my supplements (not throwing them away yet) and kept out the few she agreed I could continue taking, so my supplements list looks something like this at the moment.
x1 Opti Bac for Immunity
x3 Acai Berrie
x2 Turmeric capsules
x1 B/Complex with Magnesium
x2 Vitamin C (with no orange in it)
x2 20 drops in water of Milk Thistle Tincture
Vitamin D in spray formula
All of this was for me personally and for someone with a A+ blood group, so if anyone is interested in Kinesiology I would suggest that you go on this site http://www.kinesiologyfederation.co.uk to find a qualified practitioner in your area and try and find out your blood group from your doctor if your like me and had surgery they will have your blood group somewhere on file.
Links to verified brands http://www.avogel.co.uk and http://www.viridian-nutrition.com
Blood type diet book writer Dr Peter D Adamo http://www.dadamo.com/ and if your blood type A and have breast cancer then this is worth a read http://naturalhealthtechniques.com/specificdiseasesbreast_cancer_blood_type_a.htm
*The Kinesiology Federation gives the following definition:
'Kinesiology, literally the study of body movement, is a holistic approach to balancing the movement and interaction of a person's energy systems. Gentle assessment of muscle response monitors those areas where blocks and imbalances are impairing physical, emotional or energetic well -being. The same method can identify factors that may be contributing to such imbalances. The body's natural healing responses are stimulated by attention to reflex and acupressure points, and by use of specific body movements and nutritional support. These can lead to increased physical and mental, emotional and spiritual well-being.'
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